The three ‘C’s’ for a healthier way to discipline your child

Whether it’s the naughty step, time-out or a reward chart, parents are constantly searching for the golden secret to dispelling bad behaviour. Yet during those testing times of toddler tantrums, it can sometimes feel that all those tricks just don’t seem to work. In fact, a recent study of over 2000 parents of children aged 2-11 years, felt that their discipline methods didn’t work. We have long been lead to believe that bad behaviour equals punishment. But in fact, the word discipline comes from the latin disciplina, meaning teaching and learning. Child behavioural experts are now teaching parents the basics of discipline without the need for punishment. Compiling together research and expert opinions, we’ve narrowed it down into three steps, or the three ‘C’s’.

Consistency

Kids thrive on structure; consistency is key. It goes without saying that every child is different, so if you’re a parent of more than one child, you may find that while one rule may work for one child, it’s less effective on their sibling. The most important thing is to be consistent with all rules, rewards and consequences every day. Some issues are truly important, especially when it comes to safety. Although it may seem difficult, try your best not to give in ‘just this once’. Next time this issue arises, your child will remember and know you may change your mind.

Communication

We can’t stress this one enough; communication is the key to a happier relationship with your child. Just experienced a huge tantrum over dinner? Quite often, the tantrum has nothing to do with the current situation. Perhaps they are upset over something that happened at nursery. Maybe they feel unwell. By taking the time to find out ‘why’, you might choose a different course of action. Communication applies not only to you and your child, but also to the whole family. Be certain that everyone in the family agrees on your rules and consequences; children find inconsistencies very confusing, and are more likely to test limits with other adults.

Calm

When disciplining your child, keep calm and in control. Children are highly attuned to emotions, and will consequently try to take advantage of an exhausted, frustrated and emotional adult. While you may feel ready to tear your hair out, don’t be afraid to take a minute to yourself to assess the situation. Take a deep breath and speak to your child in a calm voice. Perhaps you need to take them aside so they have your full attention. Make them aware of what they have done wrong, what the consequences are and what they should have done differently. It may seem impossible at the time, but you will be surprised at how much quicker the tantrum diffuses.

Do you have any tried and tested methods for dispelling tantrums? Let us know and share your tips on our social media channels…